Monday, July 18, 2011
Connected to the Whole Wide World!
The Steve Job’s, Bill Gate’s and Mark Zuckerberg’s of the world insist we should all be connected that our lives will be vastly improved by connecting to everyone and everything the world has to offer; but WHO are we connecting too?
We plug into social networking (that’s right, “the” social networking FACEBOOK) where we “friend” everyone we’ve ever met, the same people we once chose not to stay in relationships with. Let’s face it, the people we truly love and care about don’t vanish from our lives, they are removed, either by us or by them. When we find these acquaintances that we may have met once at a party, a cousins wedding, someone twice removed from a real friend, we send them the standard message “hey…how have you been, I’m good, I work here…what are you up to…and two or three other casual sentences and then they forever sit in your friends list where they become one more notch on our wall and forever waiting for that golden “like” on whatever crap they have to say that you really don’t give a shit about anyway. Then when you’re bored looking at the same old bullshit and quotes by famous smart people, authors and movie stars that these “friends” try to pass off as their own original thought, you start to add more people, scrolling down their friends lists and adding everyone they’ve ever met and their friends and them, and they…
We go to chat rooms to find people with seemingly similar interests and talk the msn speak about how easy it is to talk to someone you’ve never met who could very well be jerking off on your face while you pour your heart out about your dead dog. Chat roulette anyone? Save yourself time and just scroll through pictures of dicks. Not my idea of a good time.
We look for love on dating sites, scouring the internet looking for that picture of our next true love. Seriously…options like “wink” “flirt” “send a message” give me a break…”Hey” typed on my screen with a winky emicon doesn’t make me wet. Even if he has a picture of himself at a great angle ten years and twenty pounds ago. Where did old fashioned courting go? “Hey…add me on MSN so we can chat” loose translation, “I want to show my penis and gauge your reaction”. In fact it actually pisses me off more to wait while someone feebly tries to type small talk (in abbreviations no less) and I have to watch BigJohn69 is typing a message blinking below me for twelve minutes waiting to respond to whatever he throws out there at fifty fucking words a minute. Nothing breaks the heat like waiting; it makes me as hot as standing in the line-up at the pharmacy buying tampons. I’m sorry but a rose emicon is not the equivalent of fresh bouquet of flowers sitting on my desk for all of my co-workers to be jealous of. “A rose by any other name would still smell as sweet” Well, I have news for Shakespeare…emi is no rose and she smells like nothing but frustration!
We are giving up romance and personal touch for words or at least sort of…brb…ok, I’m back! Fucking stupid right? One push of a button and the ENTIRE WORLD and all of it’s sick and depraved people with all different motives and different backgrounds are one keystroke away from us. Scary thought really, you could have been chatting with a man who recently got an inheritance and acreage in Maple Ridge and you wouldn’t even know you were talking to Robert Pickton and he wouldn’t even be lying. But if you saw him in the flesh, would you know something was wrong????
We have seen every perversion laid out in front of us, come on…everyone logged on to 2girls1cup after we heard how disgusting it was. I’m still not sure what the allure was for me…I watched the entire thing, almost perplexed that there were two women in the world that would do this and if two would do it on tape, how many do this in their home. How many people do I know that would actually think that was hot or worse, have done it? I opened the door…and that’s the shit that walked in! I prefer the days before mass connection, ignorance is bliss!!!!!